I am a faggot....unfortunately...


I am a unique...different..........


few days back, my father shared something with the family.
His old friend called him up. They chatted for awhile! and then his friend ask about
my family, how is everyone...blah blah blah....

and then before he end the conversation he ask this; how that son of yours?
still like that ?( refering about being a sissy)

father; haha. he is still like that . gt slight improvement. a little bit only...
hahhahahhaha

and then they say bye bye.....


my whole family laugh after hearing that story......
oh ok....i laugh with them , well, actually, they were laughing at me.....


then my mum add on, haha, well that happen to me too....
she said that everytime she meet someone, they will always ask about me.
in their conversation, they will sure make special "segment"
which is "YOUr son STILL is a sissy or not??" or still like that arr??"


i i ask my mum whether she regret having me or not?
she said no, but she also ask and wonder why this happen to her family...
ppl ask " why must it been in her family"
my mum is strict and abit aggresive in nature...but it really a wonder why this things happen to her...



All my Life!!!!!!!!!!! All my freaking fuck up fucking stupid full of insult depressing crazy hurtful mentally torturing Life!!!!!!!
I try To be fucKING POSitive!!!


`but now i just cannot feel that why, i try very hard to be happy, not to remove the smile on my face but somehow!!! enough is enough!!


to all those bastard and bitches , moron and asshole, slut and giglo.....
whatever happen to my development is not ur fucking concern!!!!!!!
fucking biatch and sodomise bastardise mind of stereotypical male babi butoh punye sundal punye Orang.


you think i want to be that way izzit!!! you think i love being a sissy and being insulted izzit??
my life is hell, some hell which people do not know.....you know coz you people are so
called "normal" . yeah, ur voice break, u like thrilling shows, boys should do this ,boy should do that,. becoz i dun like soceer like my father is a big "wow" something wrong with ur child"
yeah, i am normal not like you becoz i do all the fuck up socially constructed stuff that define me that i am a male!!!!!!!!
you know to all this shits " FUck YOU"

I am sissy, that does not mean i am happy about It!!!!!!!
But i am trying to get the best OUt of My fuckinG LIfe which YOU bunch Of so called " Normal" people Have destroy!!!!!!!!!!! I am a sissy , that not your fucking problem, I try to chnage that , i really do...... I try to live Up to your fucking defination of male!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


but you know what, i have enuff of this shits........
plus those guys who thinks boys cannot cry, i would say this to you" get ur fucking big asshole of the world and jump down to the lowest level of hell and please offer ur self to the devil so that he can sodomise you!!!!!

the only reason guys die faster is becoz you people with that type of thought (including sluts) have disallow guys of the past until now to express their emotion!!! so they bottle up their feelings and die a terrible non-contented death.


so in summary, i am not happy for who i am, please bare that in mind. somehow it is like
a neonatal defect on me......i was born that........................
so make my life easier and shut up!!!!!!!

you dont go to a down syndrome boy and ask him this: hey , your IQ become high that qualify to go a normal primary sch? oh,, not yet arr? okok.....you will soon become intelligennt like normal people...........

that nonsensical, that is how it works for me too.....i am not saying that i leave to fate that i am faggot but it juz happen.....it not fully my fault!!!!!!

if You dont want to be born a sissy or a tomboy, that goes for me too....
i dont want that too.....
i do want to be so call normal...
but it is juz not me, not for now i hope..

this is something beyond my mind, i cannot control the hormones in me!!
or how my body work??
it just there is nothing to be blame on for who i am..


it totally fated......i juz hope ppl understand me more.......