A songbird in a golden cage
Elegant and grace portray its beauty
Cheers and applause is nothing new
for a marionnette dancing to others tune


Hey, what up all? haiz, nothin is up really......

Well, today when to North View to help out for sjab. Well, it is always fun to go there. Sjab rawk! haha, they need alot for brushing up to do. But anyway, It fun. I can see alot of committed people. Hope they dont quit half-way. the new batch is good. Really GOOD.


Something is bugging me again. I dont know why i should feel this way.
I like it so much but why I much feel thay way? Is it because it is not a well respected job in the society?

Have you think about it? If one day you were walking down the street and then you meet ex-classmate of yours. You sat down and chatted about life and suddenly your ex-classmates pop this question to you, " so what are you working as". If it is in this case I have to say," I am a nurse at XXX hospitals".

Then your ex-classmates reply " Oh for me I am engineer/doctor/business man/ scientist/lawyer/ editor/ principal and what highly prestige job have you.'
have you think about that?

HMM, I mean what am I going to become is more or less definate. But i Look at MY friends and i sigh. GOSh, they all have a great potential to be in great people with a great career. You don't see much of that for nurses. May be i am ignorant but I have not seen nurses become member of parliment or something like that.
Ok, I am not saying i dont like being a nurse, I want to be a nurse but what am I saying is when I am a nurse now, would people look at me in a same way I were to be an engineer?

HMM, think about it?

had a rough morning!


my mum was screaming coz my youngest brother sock when MISSING!

how ridiculous is that? yes, seriously ridiculous.........


GOD! thank god I am going out today..

Atleast can get some fresh air. anyway.

Gosh, my weight problem is becoming a real problem. seriously, I need to do something about it.

anyway, here is some funny images i found.....


enjoy!

MySpace Layouts

MySpace Layouts

MySpace Layouts

MySpace Layouts

Myspace

MySpace Layouts

Well, see anything different? haha.....

It is a new blogskins. Nice. sweet and soothing to the eyes. haha

well, I like the previous blogskins but it abit crude lah....plus i gt bored of it..

Now this new blogskins will be a new way how i portray myself.


<======== you can ignore that picture

haha, well, that picture is quite an accident. Ok, i mean how the pic end up there is an accident. LOL. i just randomly put it there and suddenly everything fall into it place. I like


i just need a simple and neat blogskin for now. Plus with the turmoil inside, tranquility is just the perfect word I need . Looking at it make me feel better already.

haha.
The song playing is none other than M2M - mirror mirror.
Sweet duo from the past.
Well, Old song have good lyric. i mean meaningful lyrics. haha


Anyway, I am cool down already and i dun really mean wat i say. except for the moving out part. LOL.

TO Uncle : get well soon. Don't let that stroke beat you down! your're a survivor.

haiz.
seriously, I cant wait to get my diploma in nursing. I seriously cant wait to get it. It would be great rite. haiz, but I have to wait another 2 more years for it.


once i get a stable job and earn myself a living, i am serious going to move out. I am like freaking sick of living with my family. It is like really a pain in ASS!

Urgh!! Obviously, if i am gonna out, I will seriously move away from them. Really far away from them. GOSh, i need to get away from them. all of them seem to be pissing me me off. Freaking irritating!!!! Plus I dont want to have anyting to do with them. Call me unfillial or watsoever. But seriously, it not worth it...

They are like choking me upside-down-and-to death. Haiz, I mean i rather lived in a small rented room. at least I will have a privacy of my own.

Compare this. I am living in a 3 room apartment with another 5 ppl. How to live like that? It is like seriously suck to the bloody core. And every shitty nagging that was said, everyone is affected.

Worse, in my house, there no fucking such thing as two way communication. It is considered TABOO!! or culturally rude. Haiz, wat type of family i am living with. seriously......
Honestly, i am never proud of my family, really they are " backward"


dunno why but i feel like saying this out loud


FUCK! I am totally FUCK!

To Tian Yu!!!!!

Happy 18th birthday !!!

A year older and you have become a year wiser and Hop[e] you are a YEAR HAPPIER!!!. I pray that all your wishes will come true. RAWK ON!!!

LEts TalK about SNAG!


not as in Snag which mean problem that is not very serious


but more LIKE SENSITIVE NEW AGE GUYS!

My brother text message me and ask" hasrul are you a Snag?"
My first reaction was " what the fuck?" LOL

so then I ponder and ponder and I decide that I am ONE!!

LOL!

I shall Say the SNAG would be the new type of guys in the Evolutionary chain!!
HELL to all Women who go against them. Wahahaha. It time that men should be emotionally independent. They should now learn to understand their emotion and not running away from IT.

When talk about Snag, i dont believe a snag is the type of guys who understand women feeling. I mean I am snag but truly, understanding women is like knowing the true value of PIE! Pie as in the math symbol that you people use to find area of a circle. yes that pie!! you know the true value of it? then show me the answer of 22/7.LOL

SEE, A women mind like i say again it is like a whirlpool. One moment they say yes, and the next moment the say no. Indecisive but that is their nature. If it is a natural flaw, they would have been extinct by now. BUt they have survive for century with that whirlpool mind, so it must have been a good thing.

So my definition of snag are men who do not restrict,surpressed,repressed their emotion. They let out their feeling and thought and they put down the act of "macho" so that they can express their true nature and are proud of it. Snag are men who may be impulsive and not necessarily what you bunch of men, who think that you people are the cool guy and the most macho or whatever shits there is, define as " ah gua".

It would be great if more men nowadays can voice out what they feel. It would improve men communication as father, husband, a friend and lover.
COOL!

Plus this type of men can have a longer life!!
wahahahha.

So something to ponder. What if all men are snag? Do you think it may upset the natural balance? LOL wahahaha

YESteday MorniNG!


I just woke up! As usual everybody was busy getting ready to go out and meet the demand of society. MY youngest bro when to sch, my other two eldest dunno where they go. MY parents when out and work so that we can always eat with a silver spoon.

Then me, haha, was the last one to wake up. @ 730am i am awake. MY Mum suddenly gave me this phone.....




Nokia 6230i

Mum : take this phone. I want you to have it?
Me :(Dumbfounded) erm?? why are you giving me this?
I dont want the phone. later I lost it how?
MUM: I trust you. It time you learn to take care of your stuff well.
Me: (blur face) erm OK!!

THEn wat happen to my motorola V220?




Mum: tell you brother thanks for lending the phone to you. and
say sorry to him for all the inconvenience you have done to him.

Me: (stupid look) eh? OK!! i will tell him that



LOL LOL


ok, i am not that materialistic but then again the phone is not bad.
Yet, I still have not harness the full potential of this phone.

so then the mountain hermit me start to exploit this new technology

hey, yesterday was the first time i bluetooth something. LOL
The first thing I do is to transfer as many song as I can
and also take as many self photo as much as I want!

wahahahaha. but then when I transfer the the pic to my PC it turn out to be like this.

OH SSHIT PHOTOBUCKET IS HAVING MAINTENANCE !!

sorry, cant compare the picture! LOL

anyway,

today duty for Singapore Robotic Games ended.

I seen alot of robot but not actually interested in it.
kind of boring, hahaha....LOL


but seeing but bunch of secondary and primary school student there really depressed me. Hey, they are still lively and never have to think about the future.
SWeet young stuff unlike me, an old 17 going 18 ugly thing. haix

To kill a mocking bird

Well, I finish reading that book!!! wahahhaha
I am not literature student but I know a good book when I read one.
This is one of them. This book Touches on racism and the Dominance of the white toward the nigger.

But above all, this book tell me that is goodness in everyone out there. Just that
we choose to see the hole instead of the Donut. haha


Anyway, My attachment ended also. To ward 76, THANK YOU SO MUCH!.
The Ward teach me alot of things and as student, I improve alot!.
i did alot of dressing and I will try to maintain the aseptic rules!


I finish reading my book and my attachment. haha, double happiness and double the feeling of achievment. Now I want to borrow Memoir of Lee kuan YEW. hehex. I am sure it will be fun reading that but first


it is Pokemon time.
GONNA CATCH'EM ALL!!

I would like to wish a HApPY birthday Firstly to my eldest brother and secondlY to a friend HEnry Aw . Wish both of to be happy and enjoy life more!

moving on

Yesterday, a friend of mine, Shira, ask me something. She asked whether we are close
as a friend. I mean, is our friendship bond is very Strong or rather are we strongly emotionally attach to each other?


I took sometime to think and I have to say this,
Well, although i noe her for about a year. Emotionally i feel nothing.
I mean if somebody asked me who is my friends, the only thing I will say is My secondary school friends. For some reason, I miss my friends alot. We know each other for about 5 yrs and nothing could break that UP. Though i am not close to them anymore, I remember that I once call them my treasure. They are my jewels, sapphire, Diamonds ,ruby and everything.
And for that, I dunno whY I miss them so much like no ending.



but at the same time i wonder?

as much as i think, I dont talk to them much lately. In msn and real life. I mean when i talk to them there is like no common topic.
I feel so isolated from them. I understand that it cannot be like last time and I was trying to put my hearts and soul in my new friends coz I noe my other friends are moving on in their life. I want to move on. BUt everytime this happen, my secondary sch friends always come first.

if something bad happen, i would silently worry for them. Missing them like crazy?
well, you can put it that way.


Plus i always miss the irritant like Audi and Tian Yu. Those Two fun guys. Hhaha, really they crack me up most of the times. These two boys change alot. Plus i LIKE the new them. One used to be narrow mind like the longkang and the other like to be the cool GUY who spit water at me during PE respectively! LOL, now mind have gone beyond the horizon and Ty have been very emo! LOL, If my past for example I am sec 3 were to see the future such a now. I be laughing my ass to death.


The Goody goody people like Azhar(brother bear) and All virgin Ming Hai and proud to be a nerd Kai YUAn.
The ASS(april, sarala, sarah) club TOO, they are the charmed one of north view.
the unbreakable trio
and people even closer like gorgeous Ruth and QUINCY!
Hey Quincy can really look pretty. haha

Love all of YOU ALOT!

Plus What I love the most is is screaming at the top of my voice and calling out their name.
Haha.

I was reading Clara's and TY's blog.

Well, Boy they sure noe how to insult GUYS!

haha, I am trying to rebel against their opinion, but give me the chance to
Counter their opinion. Since They open up a very Gud topic! Lets JOIN!

ANIWAY, this is not a WORDs WAR! i am just doing this for the fun of iT!
No offences to anyone or everyONE!

Every now and then, women keep complain about men and how they do?
BUT at the same time, they really know what is the very nature of men?

THEir truth feeling and their perspective!
First thing first!
WHat the hell is wrong when a GUYs whine?
Somehow With my 17 years of life, the only Guy I see whining is the one in the mirror!
I am not trying say all men should be a faggot but ITs is emotionally challenging to bottle up emotion. Isnt it better to let out your emotion and then letting it eat you from the inside.
PLus dont many know that the very reason men die fast is becoz they dun have emotional comfort!

Women at the same time can be a really vicious thing!
wht they do is always complain when my "boyfriend cried when blah blah happen"
Plus it is the women fault for making Guys to fail to understand their emotion.
Since the start of birth, every men was told " dun cry or else I make wear a skirt" or
" if u cry, u will be a bapoK"


THat is totally wrong, since birth, their emotion is surpressed! Not given a chance to be ouT.
Then when go to school the whole vicious cycle repeat.
And then, WHen they grow up, theY DUNNO know what is going out in their hearts and soul. Worse they dun understand it........this is how they become jerk/bastard of what most normal women claim. PLus a women is someone important for a GUY to rely on. Every men
you see is not what they are truly. They have things call the "masculine pretense"


They always try to show the gal how tough they are and to be what they are not capable in the first place. This is "masculine pretense". So women dun expect men to be what they claim, it is in their nature to be that way and also it is the opposite gender fault and the very culture we live in. SO women must not expect them to be a strong/super masculine/ tough guy/ or whatsoever kind of person. Women should make their boys drop the act. A lady should act natural and accept the men flaw and encourage them to be natural! If U are natural, the men will be natural.

haha, it sounds like I am making the women all the work and it is not fair? but hey since when life is fair ritex.

ALWAYS REMEMBER THIS GUYS IS THE WEAKER SEX! emotionally.

Let them talk! be what they are. they to are humans and literally need shoulder to cry on. they too will grow bored....

ANYWAY YOU PEOPLE MALE/female should read more books on relationship!
it help!

ok look at the time 11.47 pm, tomolo me morning shift! so got to fly!!

i am writing this for FUN!! ntn against anyone, thanks Clara and TY for givng me the inspiration to write something on my blog!

FIrst Thing first,

I pass mY exams!! whahahahahaha,
I am like so freakIN happy!!
DUNNO lah!


but but but

My grade point average neither increase nor decrease?
so is this a Good thing?
anyway, as usual I earn myself an A for Bio. hehex

the rest of the module, all crumble! wahahahaha.
NO lah, nt that bad lah.a two Bs and two C+s.

HAhA, So OfficiallY! I declare Without any Doubt that I am now a Yr 2 student!
wahhahahahah. FUn FUN FUN!
woo HOO!

Like what HOW the Macdanold advertisement say it " I'm Lovin IT"
Hahaha, 3 more days and attachmenT end!
Soon it would be my holidays TOO!


LOVE IT LOVE IT

it friday...


yawn.......had a bad day!
Not that bad lah, the SISTEr is not happy tht we went for our tea break so late!

my client today is all very nice!!
All happening......all I can relate too


The human touch is worth alot. It always emotionally rewarding when U do something nice to someone! Woo hoo, last monday a patient pray for me to become a Doctor one day. LOLx
HAHA, I mean complete stranger to you pray for your well being and wish you success in life.
I mean What more can I ask for? My heart just fill with JOY! I mean You dont get this all the time! a simple prayer just make my time

Plus The patients always say they Like My smile!
Truly? can My smile really cheer Your UP?
Hahaz, power of Smiling!


Smile Some MORE!!
IT can reallY make someone's day!

Instructions: The tagged victim has to come up with 8 different points of their perfect lover. Specify the gender of the target. Tag 8 victims to join this game and leave a comment on their page saying they've been tagged. If tagged the 2nd time, there's no need to post again

Gender: Female


1st; She must be abit masculine lah. To balance out the Ying and yang. Wahahaha. You ppl know what I mean ritex

2nd; She must have long hairs.

3rd; must have the same level of insanity with me. I Cant stand serious people.

4th; knows how to counter my irritation . I dont respect people who cannot backfire my irritating jokes.

5th; Must have a positive attitude toward life

6th; she must be an extrovert and willing to try something NeW

7th; must be a non-smoker!

8th; a nurse? haha, it is nice to have someone with the same carreer with YOU!


LOLx, Now i Tag, Khai, Syaz, Juliana, Jamie, Grace, Darina, Huda and shiQi to do this!

first of all I have nothing to update...


What do you guys want to know about?
my hospital attachment?

lah, it is boring lah.....nothing much to say...


except it is quite a gud week, I have alot of learning experience
EN Faizah have taught alot on how the Operating Theater works. OK
It is cool lah.....but ntn much can do lor


But I know This week i do alot wound dressing.
See alot of wound!
I got one Uncle hor, his scrotum there is gangreneous . So necrotic lah. The was this black patch and it surrounding got alot of small patch Ulcer. So cool if Audi have that also.Anyway, I look at him I also very sad. 90 yrs old man.
Unable to talk and just lay there bedridden. In my heart he should not undergone this surgery in the first place. Let him go in peace and dignified. IT not worth it to died in tremondous pain.


Another patient i dunno him so well, but when I know his diagnosis my heart felt to the
earth. Sweet young Man only 21, have a cancer of the Colon. I was like WHAT THE FUCK?
I was choke with disbelief. HOW COuld THIS BE? oh My God, this is not fair! Not FUCKInG FAir! Urgghh, Ok, this is not My problem lah but still Imagine U kana This now!

Still Young and have so many things to explore, BUt due to this freaking shit disease, he have to go in and out of hospital. I see is Face also very pale. I can see a sense of hopelessness in him...
It really stir up my emotion. I have not Right to ask the Divine One why did happen, but Young man like him should not be that way. It just should not. He should be like Having fun with is MATs friend and Dating and whatsoever.

Such A cruel fate......Fuck IT lah.....REality reallY SUcK!

CHild

The pale moon unmove
nevertheless it illuminate its light
Facing it with so much sorrow
No solace from it tonight

He call for whatever exist
but Chang'er ignore him
Selene cover her's ears
Hope for a defile child is dim

Innocent but treat like a fiend
Stigmatized from a start of birth
A jynx like the pariah
Dirt and dust from the core of Earth

A scion's story



He pride himself with wealth and Gold
Scion of a powerful household
But his mind is a sea of broken thought
Callous indifference of other's suffering

Though the we are same in everything
His heart was mine
mine was his
our taboo love cannot be tame

He is the scion of a great family
he have a destined path
everything done in discreet
or face the Patriach's wrath

Wealth in exchange for his will
the fate of all heir
his love is to me, forbidden
Queer love cannot be there

Today's official post.

Had to go to some stupid bbq. What the hell is that for? Suddenly my mum decided to organise one. Waste of precious Time. We just had a bbq during the last chinese new year Holiday.............plus I am worn out beoz of attachment. Shit lah, My plan was to watch brokeback mountain @ TY's hse. damn, I miss a GUd show,THough he claim in his blog that is "shits". Hmm, maybe he is more inclined to watch thriller movie.

Anyway, was damn bored at the dumb BBQ that I finish reading a novel by Catherine Lim. It is title as " Following The Wrong GOd HOMe".

It Is very Interesting and when the main Character died, IT really Give me a heavy BLOW. MY whole emotion blended with the book and when there is a twist in the story, a whirlwind mess up my heart......

I like the book but at the same time,I have regret for reading such tragic love story....

I gt tag by TY to do this


Instructions: The tagged victim has to come up with 8 different points of their perfect lover. Specify the gender of the target. Tag 8 victims to join this game and leave a comment on their page saying they've been tagged. If tagged the 2nd time, there's no need to post again

Gender: I dunno what Gender to choose lah


So I skip hor.....haven decided what to become lah whahaha
I do it later once I find the answer....LOL

3 Of March!

HEHEx....Attachment was hell abit lah, for that day only. Haha...the day before was
Good lah. So enrolled nurse was screaming and whining about people not help her bath patients. WHatever The shiTS lah......she was nice..maybe having PMS that day..

So I decided To close ONE EYe for that matter.

After that everything went fine. Meet UP with Tian YU, Lala and that Kai Yuan.
Kai YUan Was late very Late. Niway Had dinner with lala and Ty @ causeway point and then meet UP with KY @ yishun. After That We went to Yishun pond and did some start GazinG! It was nice.

A sweet way to end the evening...........